No Rest for the Bold

There is a fucking movie called Hannah and her Brothers and it's categorized as gay and lesbian cinema.

This could be the death of wit.

Verdict: 8/10

Ambushed!

Damn, this fucking video almost got me.

Verdict: 9/10

No Shelter in Language

The lights on River Liffey at night when I am alone.

Verdict: 7/10

This Blog won the 2008 award for best writing.

YHTALMM wasn't nominated.

Verdict: 8/10

For better and for worse

My best friend and I have both seen Dreamgirls.

Verdict: 4/10

Things Always Get Worse

Rock bottom.

Verdict: 7

The Ineluctable Top Ten Woody Allen Films of All Time: Collaborative Consistency

[Ed. note: In the interest of resolving long-standing tensions within our fruitful collective DM and HCE set about once and for all determining in a completely sincere mien the best Woody Allen movies of all time. Below is that undeniably correct list, determined by taking the average of individual lists submitted by HCE and DM (A list was solicited from KOK [King of Kewl] in order for tie-breaking purposes, see bottom). Further, for purposes of transparency, each voter's list is published in full]


The Ten Greatest Woody Allen Films Ever, Determined to be Factual by Reasoning both Scientific and Philosophical, Agreed upon by Authority of Empirical Evidence and Affective Materialist Thought:

1. Hannah and Her Sisters
2. Annie Hall
3. The Purple Rose of Cairo
4. Love and Death
5. Manhattan
6. Husbands and Wives
7. A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy
8. Another Woman
9. Deconstructing Harry
10. Stardust Memories

Death Mask:

1. Hannah and Her Sisters
2. Annie Hall
3. The Purple Rose of Cairo
4. Manhattan
5. Love and Death
6. Another Woman
7. Stardust Memories
8. Interiors
9. Deconstructing Harry
10. Husbands and Wives

These lists are not featured on WWABAB directly because of the pathos and sentimental value we have allotted to Woody Allen, the director, or any of his works. The lists are here because of the fondness with which I will always remember HCE and my arguments over subjects we basically agree on. If I were prompted to write this list in a week, the result would invariably differ. But here, today, my friend and I jotted these down in a minute flat to end (thru combiinng), a mild fight we've been having since we met.

Verdict: 8.5


HC Earwicker:

1. Hannah and Her Sisters (1986)
2. Annie Hall (1977)
3. Husbands and Wives (1992)
4. The Purple Rose of Cairo (1985)
5. A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy (1982)
6. Love and Death (1975)
7. Manhattan (1979)
8. Match Point (2005)
9. Deconstructing Harry (1997)
10. Interiors (1978)

The secret to averages is that they're not democratic. They are purposefully vindictive and aggressive. In the taking of an average you require two bits of information to first be consumed within each other and then split into parts that never existed independently. The taking of averages is the equivalent of Solomon ripping that baby in half and delivering the two portions to the mothers as unquestionable truth.

Yet, in a bizarre and ineluctable way, the baby ripped in half is the truth of the Solomon episode, and thereby the truth quality of averages that democracy never perfects. My partner and I grasped this distinction early on, as she threatened to guarantee the hated "Scoop" a spot on the top ten by placing it first on her list. I countered with "Melinda and Melinda," and the negotiations were on. Tempers flared. I was ready to sabotage the whole thing just to piss someone off.

But in the end our lists were strikingly similar. This is the power of the average and why our list of best Woody Allen films is undeniably correct. It is the authority of the baby torn apart that demands your agreement.

Verdict: 8


WWABAB BONUS! TIE-BREAKER LIST BY GUEST CONTRIBUTOR KOK (King of Kewl):

Annie Hall

Manhattan

Hannah and her Sisters

Stardust memories

Sleeper

Crimes and Misdemeanors

Deconstructing Harry

Purple Rose of Cairo

Interiors

Match Point

KOK Note: I've never seen Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy. Runners up include Love and Death, September, and Husbands and Wives.